Forgiveness is an interesting concept. I used to think that forgiveness meant that you forgive the person and then try to mend the relationship, have them back into your home, hang out with them, etc.
No, Not always. I talked to my pastor about that. He said you can forgive someone, but that doesn't mean you have to open up your door for them again or your heart.
Forgiveness is done for your own self, and to bring peace. However, forgiveness does not mean you should be stupid and put yourself back in the line of fire.
Some relationships are not mendable, and you can forgive and walk away, and that should be fine. For example, if your husband beat the crap out of you, and you split up, and you forgive him, that doesn't mean you should go back to the relationship to most likely get beat again.
The same analogy can be used for friendships or family. If another person does things that are toxic to your soul and cause you a lot of mental anguish, you can forgive them, but that doesn't mean it is healthy or safe for you to be in a close relationship in the future. For example, I have a relative that has publically shamed me and said terrible about my marriage and who I am in a group setting in front of close personal relatives. She tried to interfere with my marriage and relationships with others. She came back to me asking for forgiveness recently. However, I had forgiven her in my heart two years ago, and I had blocked her from contacting me. I accept her apology, but I don't forget, and I do not want a relationship with her not now, or in the future. The relationship is irretrievably broken for good. I am at peace with that decision.
Some people just aren't good for your soul, and they are not meant to be in your inner circle. I tend to feel that if I feel at peace with something, then it is all good.
There is a verse in the Bible that says your own soul will tell you what to do.
Ecclesiasticus 37: "Finally stick to the advice your own heart gives you, no one can be truer to you than that; since a man's soul often forewarns him better than seven watchmen perched on a watchtower. "
Amazing! In the Bible, it even says that your own heart is going to give you better advice than 7 other people looking out for you!
I have found when I forgive someone it gives me peace of mind that I have done all I can in that relationship and it is time to move on, and I can feel good about that choice. In many cases, your mental health, overall wellbeing, and safety have to come first.
What does forgiveness mean to you?
|It is good to walk away from relationships that are toxic to your soul and wellbeing